Grief is inevitable. Everyone will eventually be faced with coping with life after loss of someone dear. Usually, the closer we are to the person that died, the more intense the grief will be. The adjustment can be difficult, but there is help for making that adjustment.
For many widowed individuals, the family unit is scattered or no longer exists, and there may be no one to share those feelings of sadness, anger, or guilt. Even with intact family groups, you may hear “I really can’t talk about it right now”, when talking about these feelings is what is needed.
A grief support group may help you sort out some of these issues. The emphasis is on “support”. There is no advice or suggestions, such as “ It’s been a year, don’t you think you should move on with your life?” The most important thing a grief support group can do is listen. That listening is done by people who have also lost a loved one and needed someone to share their grief. Some of the issues others share may be similar to what you are going through. If you are not sure about what you need, contact us at facilitator@HoustonGriefSupport.org or call Rev. Curtis Matthys at 281-487-8787.
Another type of group is called “time-limited” or “closed format”, and usually runs for a certain length of time with a planned program and a limited number of participants. This type is usually led by trained counselors.
If you don’t know where to turn, talk to your minister, or come sit-in on one of our meetings at the First United Methodist Church in Pasadena. No appointment needed.
Who attends and receives help from our group? Our membership encompasses any adult who is grieving the loss of a loved one; spouse, adult child, juvenile child, parent, sibling, companion or friend. We can’t cure grief, no one can. Talking about and sharing with others who have gone through similar losses can help lessen the pain. It’s good to know that someone else can understand your feelings without judging. Should you be over your grief? Being over the pain of losing a loved one does not mean forgetting that person. But rather adjusting your life to go on without that individual. There is no time limit.
What to expect. We introduce ourselves and talk about how we coped during the week. The facilitator may read an article about grief management or suggest a topic to discuss. Each individual may share any feelings, experiences or memories. Sometimes, they may not feel like sharing or talking. That’s OK! No one offers advice or tells you how you should be grieving. Everyone is given the opportunity to talk without interruption. We end our meeting by joining hands and saying The Lord’s Prayer.
How did your loved one die? Some losses are so traumatic or violent that it’s difficult to understand what happened. If you are a survivor of this type of loss, you are probably experiencing Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Please seek the help of a professional counselor. Your counselor may recommend a support group.
No group or counselor can make grief disappear, but sharing helps to lessen the pain.